The secret to having JOY is love. Here it is:

J = Love Jesus
O = Love Others
Y = Love Yourself

The bible says the greatest commandment is to love the Lord thy God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your might. You START by loving the Lord Jesus.

The bible says the second greatest commandment is like unto the first… love thy neighbor as yourself. Add to loving Jesus- loving others… but don’t forget yourself. Loving yourself above or before Jesus or others is wrong… but to not love yourself at all is wrong too. If you leave out loving any of these (including yourself), you will not have JOY. You would have Oy, or Jy, or Jo… but not JOY.

Likewise, if you love any of these out of order, you will not have Joy. If you put yourself first, you are loving yourself more than others and more than Jesus. This is breaking a commandment and would give you Yjo or Yoj. Neither of which is JOY. If you put others consistently before yourself, you’re on the right track, but if they are before Jesus, you’re still mixed up and without JOY. You’d have instead, Ojy or Oyj.

Nope. There is no other way to get JOY. You have to have love for the right people and in the right order and amount. That is…

1. Love Jesus first. More than anyone else (yourself included!). Put Jesus first in ALL you do. Period.

2. Then love others. More than yourself. Think of others before yourself. (Think: polite, courteous, etc.) Go out of your way to help others; go the extra mile.

3. Then love yourself. Do not neglect yourself. Some people go too far with loving themselves, getting all puffed up with pride and putting themselves ahead of everyone else including God, even though they may not set out to do so intentionally. Others, though, go too far the other way and think so little of themselves that they completely neglect caring for themselves. They come to despise and loathe their own selves…their own body and mind. This won’t bring you JOY either. Don’t neglect yourself; take care of your body and mind. Yes!, put Jesus and others first, but don’t leave off the caring and loving of yourself completely or you will be left with either Jo (almost right) or Oj (nowhere near right).

To recap: The secret to having JOY is in having LOVE for the right people in the right amounts and order. That is:

J = Love Jesus
O = Love Others
Y = Love Yourself

Bible references: Matthew 22:35-39, John 15:10-11

(see I Corinthians 13 for more details on what exactly love -charity- is, it will give you ideas on HOW to love)

Posted: August 23rd, 2008 under FLYing, faith, mildly "article-ish", the changing me.
Comments: 2

I called a number I’ve had for weeks and weeks now, armed with not much more than a positive test result. Scratch that, armed with the Holy Spirit, so a whole lot more than a positive test result. I would not have been able to get through the call had I not done a bit of serious praying first. The short/good news is I have an appt the 17th… but now I’m worried…

The doctor himself called me back after I told the receptionist I’d had a positive IgM test through Igenex and that I’d heard the dr treats Lyme, and he did sound so nice, AND (and this was so cool!) he actually started out by believing me (which is so weird, ya know!). I know because he said I wasn’t very old but I’d been hit by a truck. Yup. That pretty much sums it up. And I was glad when he didn’t start asking me for symptoms, too, because that is something I’ve been worried about. That initial question. Not because I don’t have symptoms, mind you. Oh far from that! But because when asked outright like that, for some reason my mind freezes and shuts down and I have major problems pulling anything back out of the abyss of my mind in order to LIST them. So that was so nice, though I’m sure it seems kinda weird.

But then he found out I don’t have insurance, and maybe it’s just my imagination (ok, actually it probably is…probably more than a little of the OCD, anxiety, PARANOIA, etc creepin’ in), but it seemed like something changed.

Started off by saying it wasn’t free. Yeah, I KNOW that. I’m willing to pay. I don’t like it, but not because his expertise and/or the testing/meds are not worth the $$, just because I don’t like spending that kind of $$ on ME. My kids? Absolutely. Me? Never before. So it hurts me to do it in that regard.

And of course $$ isn’t exactly free-flowing around here, otherwise I would have had insurance years ago… I digress.

Why the difference I wonder? Do you think he is annoyed at/with me because he’s afraid I can’t/won’t pay?

I TOTALLY am going to pay. He will have his $$ every visit I go to. If I can’t pay, I won’t go in. I just won’t.

I HAVE gone in to the ER not being able to pay, but that is totally different. I have never and WILL never (if I have anything to say about it at all) go to a dr visit knowing I can’t pay for it. I just won’t.

Shoot. That’s why I’ve never gone in with all the various possible sinus or bladder or chest or kidney even… infections over the years. Cause I was not prepared to dish out the money. (I technically COULD have, but I didn’t see it as crucial since I had garlic and so could try that first, so therefore it was optional. And optional actually means not an option when it comes to ME. Know what I mean?)

So I did it. I grabbed the bulls by the horn sotospeak and actually DID something for FlyLady’s Anti-Procrastination Day. I made a dr appt for myself. And now? Now I have to find the $300 for the appt. Scratch that. Now I have to (attempt to!!) exercise patience and wait on the Lord to provide the $300 for the appt… oh and also the $190 for the testing for Matthew… and also the however-much-it-will-be for the meds I need.

It’s ok, though. Phillipians 4:19, Chris. Also, consider the lillies, Chris. And also? My God is a great BIG AWESOME God and no amount of $$ is too big for Him to round up. Doesn’t even qualify as pocket change for Him.

Deep breaths. Need to go either hyperventilate (not a good option) or maybe veg-out for a bit to get my mind off freakin’ out about the whole “did I upset the dr? did I offend him somehow? did I annoy him? did I say the right things? did I just mess up horribly?” thing.

Yeah. Can’t concentrate on much else at the moment. OCD much? =/

Posted: June 4th, 2008 under FLYing, faith, just life, the changing me.
Comments: none

So after all the excitement last week, I must say this week is seeming very blah in some ways. That’s ok, though, any more excitement would probably be just too much. =)

Monday morning, Meagan had an appt with the eye doc. She’s going back in glasses. I’m not surprised in the least. Actually, I was surprised she had the 3-4 years without glasses! I was afraid we’d have to out-of-pocket the glasses again in order to get a pair she would wear, but thankfully the state insurance has expanded their selection of frames they’ll pay for. She found a pair she liked, but they were brown. The gal told her she could order them in pink and there ya go! They should be ready in a week or so.

Mike’s prescriptions from the VA came in. Doc had told him he was going to be on a med for lowering his cholesterol. He neglected to mention he’d also prescribed a med for the high blood sugar. Basically Mike was told, “You have high blood sugar.” That’s it. No info on what to DO about it, no info on what to NOT do, nothing. So now I’ve got another project…learn about Type 2 Diabetes, and how to monitor blood sugar. Oy vey! We were going to out-of-pocket the monitoring supplies, since when Mike called to ask about it this morning he was told simply that they would re-check his levels in July. (Nice to mention that, guys!) Then I found out how much the test strips cost! YIKES! Even the cheap ones would run us $20 a week. =( I think Mike is going to call the clinic back and see about getting a prescription through VA. I just can’t believe they would put him on a glucose-lowering med without word one about it and with nary a care about monitoring the blood sugar levels. Makes me wanna scream! >=(

The dogs get loose like oh, I don’t know…every 3 seconds? Ok, maybe not quite that often, but close. They’re both bigger than Matthew, so neither of the kids are really able to get in or out the door without the dogs barreling over them to get out. Brownie, I am certain, has decided the ONLY appropriate place to pee is in the hall. Even if you take him out for an hour or more, once you bring him in… immediately he makes a lake in the hall. GRRRRRRR! Every time they get loose, they bring back more fleas and ticks. We simply can’t afford to keep dipping them, the collars have done NO good, and the drop stuff that you put on their backs eats Butterscotch’s skin up. To top it all off, Matthew REFUSES to obey the orders to STAY IN THE HOUSE and get his schoolwork done. Instead, he takes off the minute my back is turned to go chase the dogs. Not that he can successfully catch them most of the time, mind you… just because he enjoys getting in trouble, I think.

Sooo…I think Mike has finally given up on the fence idea. It was a lovely thought, really. Trouble is that lovely thought, while allowing us to keep the dogs, would also cost us several hundred dollars and several weeks worth of work. It’s really looking like we’re going to have to take them back to the pound. I hate that thought, because being grown dogs it will likely mean they’ll be put down, but I don’t see any other way. Matthew, of course, is NOT happy. Poor kid. =( He loves those dogs. They’re his best friends, and the whole reason we got the dogs was for him to have a friend. I just don’t see any other way. Had the dogs not destroyed the fence, maybe…

In other news… I hadn’t been doing much FLYing lately so Monday I determined to get some things done. I got the last 4 wks worth of school lessons mapped out. That took all day, but at least it is done. We know now, just how much he has to get done each day if he wants to finish up the year the same time his sister does. Of course, had he not been giving us such fits with the behavior, he’d have been done months ago and would be doing the extra stuff by now.

Yesterday he worked real hard all day. He didn’t get everything done because Monday he basically got nothing done due to massive meltdowns, but he did work. Grandma came by last night and we were so pleased to be able to tell her that yup, if he kept working good the rest of the week, he’d be able to spend the night Friday. Then today… *sigh* Well, let’s just say the Friday night sleepover is cancelled. =(

It’s looking like he’ll be headed for the public school next year, much as I hate the thought.

Yesterday I got more housework done than I’ve been able to do in one day in forever. I mopped two floors, got 2 loads of dishes done, cleaned the bathroom, swept several rooms, cleaned off the desk and all living room surfaces, and got all the kitchen counters scrubbed. Oh, and I also managed a shower and 2 lessons in my bible course AND a ladies meeting at church. MAN! I think that was the most productive day I’ve had this year! Today? Yeah notsomuch. I got the ironing done. Oh, and dinner is cooking.

So basically, everything is back to crazy… which is normal.

Posted: April 30th, 2008 under FLYing, Matthew, Meagan, just life, kids.
Comments: none

The following was taken from a FLYlady email I received today. It was said to be a forward, so I, too am forwarding it…to you. It’s not FLYlady original content, since it was forwarded, and I would post who the author is in order to give credit where it is due, but I simply do not know who the author is. Anyway. This is really good, and it was a blessing to me to read it today. It’s a good reminder that God is good ALL the time, even when we’re struggling. It was an encouragement for me to hear this. I hope it is to you, as well.

“A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening
appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it
struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed
to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far
as it could,and it could go no further.

So to help the butterfly

he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the
cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body
and small, shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly
because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and
expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.

Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of it’s life
crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings.

It never was able to fly.

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that
the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to
get through the tiny opening were God’s way of forcing fluid from the
body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for
flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon. Sometime
struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to
go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We
would not be as strong as what we could have been. We could never fly!

Remember…what we struggle with makes us strong!”

Posted: March 24th, 2008 under FLYing, faith.
Comments: none

It’s 9:42pm. Both kids are in bed AND quiet. First time that’s happened before 11pm in a good two weeks! I’m so excited!

Ok, so Matthew did throw a major fit, screaming and throwing things, before he finally got quiet… at least he *did* get quiet. =) At one point I told Meagan she could sleep in my room tonight if she wanted to (because he was pitching such a fit), and guess what she did. She climbed down from the bed, came into the living room where I was and conspiratorially whispered, “I’m not going to so he won’t be scared, but I will give you a hug and a kiss”. My big, sweet girl! She’s such a good big sister. Most of the time.

I was actually hoping for an 8:30pm in-bed time, but when the hot water faucet handle in the tub (yes, tub! Mike got it fixed last week after only 14mo!) came apart at 8:15pm I knew I was outta luck. You’d think since it was Matt in the tub, I could have still made the mark, since he *hates* getting clean anyway. Nope, he had to finish his bath. I guess the novelty of a bath instead of a shower is still strong enough to keep him clean.

In other news…haha…I ordered a new cookbook yesterday and bought an ebook for Science class today. The printer Bro3 bought me for Christmas is still just a stand-alone since I don’t have the new computer with Windows XP on it yet, so I had to bring hubby’s printer in and hook it up so I could start printing out the lapbook for science. It only took about 7 HOURS to get the sucker installed. I don’t know what the problem was, it just kept hanging up at 9%. UGG Anyhoo, it’s installed now so I can print off the computer again. Yea!

Since I am a flybaby again with Flylady.net, I’ve been trying to get into the habit of doing the weekly home blessing and the missions and so forth. Being achy and tingly and just blech-sick doesn’t make that easy, but after reading some articles about clutter and de-cluttering and stuff and de-stuffing this weekend, I was determined to get started again. I’m working on de-cluttering and getting some projects worked on and/or finished. So here’s what I did today:

*mucked out the pots/pans cabinet, threw out two pots and the 40+ yr old ’shelf-liner’, there are some lids that I don’t think go to anything, but I’m waiting till tomorrow when I muck out the skillet/appliance cabinet to throw them out. They just might fit one of the big skillets.
*weekly home blessing was only pick-up, sweep, and mop the living room and empty all trash. I’ll change our sheets before I climb in bed tonight.
*cut out fabric for a pair of Valentines culottes for Meagan
*de-cluttered a small trash bag full of clothes out of my closet
*got the printer installed
*got the shelf boards for Matt’s closet primed (they closet was supposed to be done back in Sept.)
*took my first test in my new bible course…I made a 95! I was so scared to take the test because I just knew I would bomb it! =)

Overall I think I got a decent amount done today, all things considered. Still on the list for this week:

*paint the boards for Matt’s closet
*go to library
*go grocery shopping and make list of aisles for ease of list-making
*de-clutter 15min each in dining room, hall, pantry, and kids room
*get the dishtowel currently in the embroidery hoop finished
*sew culottes for Meagan

Since this week’s ‘zone’ is the kitchen, I also have specific areas in the kitchen I plan on attacking each day.

It’s now 10:17pm. Think I’m going to go run the dishwasher and then snatch 15-20min playtime before going to bed earlier than I have since mid-January! =)

Posted: February 4th, 2008 under FLYing, just life, kids.
Comments: none